I don't think you're going to like my advice very much, but I think you need to let him go for now. Hear me out, I don't mean you can never be friends with the guy again. But it seems to me like he's embarrassed and feeling guilty over what he said to you that night he had a little too much to drink.
My take on it is that he has a little bit of a crush on you too, but ultimately, after crossing a line by telling you, he realized he wasn't behaving like the best boyfriend. And he evidently chose to stop doing so, which means he's trying to be a good guy. Getting a little crush on another girl doesn't make a guy a bad boyfriend, but how he handles it does. And he's trying to handle it the right way: by taking himself out of a dicey situation that might tempt him. He definitely could have handled it a little more kindly to you by at least responding and telling you his deal, but like I said, I sense that he's probably a little ashamed.
Unfortunately, that leaves you, the tempting friend, in the dust. I know it sucks to lose a friend (and maybe even more so when it's a friend you have feelings for), but I really think you've done the right thing by this guy so far. You were honest with him about your feelings, but instead of letting it go too far, you reminded him of his girlfriend. It's admirable that you wouldn't want to be a part of his affair. So I think the only way you can continue to do right by him—and by yourself, because you deserve more than a flirtation with a taken guy—is to let him take some space to figure things out in his relationship.
Maybe after some time has passed and he's either ended his relationship, or firmed up his feelings about it and let go of his crush on you, you guys can go back to your friendly ways. But for now, I think you need to let him have his space.
Do you think there's anything our reader can do to get this friendship back on track? Or should she let it go?
Other recent dilemmas:
Reader's Dilemma: Am I Overreacting to My Boyfriend's Obsessive "Family Friend"?
Reader's Dilemma: Should I Date a Guy Who Still Lives With His Ex?
Reader's Dilemma: Are My Friends Who Still Hang Out With My Ex Worth the Trouble?
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